Skip to Content

350+ Sewing Puns That Are Just Sew Funny!

Suppose you love sewing and are also fond of terrible (aka hilarious) puns. In that case, this list is most definitely for you, as we’ve managed to find and come up with some of the funniest sewing-related puns out there, which will be perfect for annoying (or delighting) your friends, colleagues, family, or even your date! 

350+ Sewing Puns That Are Just Sew Funny!

While many of these puns work as great one-liner jokes, you could just as easily use them for a sewing-related social media account or business too, so if you’re looking for some inspiration, then this list should also prove rather helpful, and since there are just so many different great puns and one liners on this list, you should definitely shouldn’t struggle with finding one that will suit you or your brand! 

So, whether you’re looking for some funny slogans to embroider on to things such as cushions or sweatshirts, or even to put onto a mug for the sewing lover in your life, then read on, and discover one of the greatest collections of puns the internet has ever seen! 

Best Sewing Related Puns

We’re going to take you through an A-Z list of some of the best puns out there, so get comfortable and be prepared to laugh (or cringe) at some of these incredible puns! 

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With A

  • A clean house is a sign that the sewing machine is broken
  • A lady never discusses the size of her fabric stash
  • A seam is a stitch your machine makes
  • A sewist and her feed dog
  • Ab-sew-lutely
  • Accuracy over speed
  • Affirmative fashion
  • All you needle is love
  • Always sew busy
  • And sew it begins
  • And sew it is
  • Anti-sewcial
  • Are you a needle? Because you’re sew special to me.
  • Are you thready for this?
  • Awl right now
  • Awl the best

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With B

  • Baby got backstitch
  • Backstitch driver
  • Backstitch to the Future
  • Bait and stitch
  • Baste to the bone
  • Beautiful things are created one stitch at a time
  • Beauty and the pleat
  • Because I said sew
  • Being a tailor is a sew-sew job
  • Big Presser Foot
  • Bobbin along
  • Bobbin chicken champion
  • Bobbin sense
  • Bobbin’s your uncle
  • Born to sew
  • Bury me in my fabric stash

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With C

  • Catch stitch 22
  • Catch stitch and release
  • Catch stitch me if you can
  • Certified fabric addict
  • Closet drama
  • Cock and wool story
  • Cotton misconception
  • Crafty sew and sew
  • Crazy sewing lady
  • Cut it out
  • Cute as a button

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With D

  • Day of the Thread
  • Daydreams and straight seams
  • Do not cut paper with my fabric scissors
  • Don’t be spoolish
  • Don’t sew there
  • Don’t thread on me
  • Doomsday sewing machine
  • Dress code
  • Dress is more

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With E

  • Eat. Sleep. Sew. Repeat.
  • Ebb and sew
  • Espressew
  • Every stitch way but loose
  • Every stitch you take, every move make

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With F

  • Fabricologist
  • Feed dogs are a sewist’s best friend
  • Filthy stitch
  • For the cotton good
  • Freudian slip stitch
  • Friends are like fabric: You can never have enough
  • From Dusk Twill Dawn
  • Funny Interface

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With G

  • Gamma rayon
  • Get your hands off the good scissors
  • Getting through the day, one stitch at a time
  • Ghost in the sewing machine
  • Good for the sewl
  • Grateful Thread

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With H

  • Hanging by a thread
  • Happiness is a full bobbin and free Saturday
  • Happy pleat
  • Harry Potter and the Order of the Seamstress
  • Have you seen my invisible thread?
  • Hem dash
  • High in fiber
  • Hot stash
  • How does a seamstress travel? She stitch-hikes.
  • How great thou dart
  • Hustle and sew

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With I

  • I am a sewing machine
  • I bitch more than I stitch
  • I cut corners
  • I don’t need therapy. I need more thread.
  • I drive fast and barefoot
  • I just want to stay home and sew
  • I love you sew much
  • I needle a little space
  • I pity the spool
  • I play with scissors for the shear fun of it
  • I practice stitchcraft
  • I sew because poking people with needles is frowned upon
  • I sew, but my favorite hobby is collecting fabric
  • I sew, therefore I swear
  • I sew. That means I have sharp needles and scissors and know how to use them.
  • I shouldn’t tell sewing jokes. I’m always running out of material.
  • I won’t backstitch down
  • I’d rather be sewing
  • I’ll be darned
  • I’m a bit of a sew-it-all
  • I’m a little stitch country
  • I’m a little stitch rock ‘n’ roll
  • I’m all about that baste
  • I’m not getting a stitch of attention
  • I’m old spool
  • I’m sensing a pattern
  • I’m sew busy
  • I’m sew into you
  • I’m sew very happy
  • I’m sexy and I sew it
  • If you only knew how much swearing went into your hand-sewn gift…
  • If you see a seam ripper, now is not a good time
  • In my defense, I was left unsupervised at the fabric store
  • In stitches
  • In the sew
  • In your interfacing
  • Interface time
  • Irony: The opposite of wrinkly
  • Isewlation
  • It’s all fun and games until the bobbin runs out
  • It’s hem!
  • It’s no fabrication
  • It’s sew o’clock somewhere
  • Itching to be stitching

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With J

  • Just sew with it
  • Just. One. More. Stitch.

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With K

  • Keep calm and sew on
  • Kiss hem for me
  • Know stitch way the wind blows

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With L

  • Laid backstitch
  • Last-stitch effort
  • Laughing sew hard
  • Let it sew
  • Let me sew and no one gets hurt
  • Let me sew ya mind
  • Let the pleat drop
  • Life is sew good
  • Life is short; buy the fabric
  • Life seams better when I’m sewing
  • Life’s a stitch
  • LL Spool J
  • Lower backstitch tattoo
  • Lucid seam

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With M

  • Make do and mend
  • Make it sew
  • Manic pixie seam girl
  • Manta rayon
  • Material culture
  • Material girl
  • Material implication
  • Material witness
  • Material world
  • May your bobbin always be full
  • Mean lean sewing machine
  • Measure twice, cut once
  • Money to sew
  • My dart will go on
  • My feed dogs are barking
  • My heart will sew on
  • My patronus is a sewing machine
  • My sew-losophy
  • My sewing time is sometimes for your safety. Remember that.
  • My soul is fed with needle and thread
  • My stitchin’ is bitchin’

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With N

  • Narrative thread
  • Needle ninja
  • Never underestimate the power of a woman with a sewing machine
  • Nobody’s spool
  • Nothing is certain but dress and taxes

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With O

  • Of course I talk to myself when I sew. Sometimes I need expert advice.
  • On pins and needles

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With P

  • Pattern recognition
  • Pin and tonic
  • Pin pals
  • Pit wool
  • Please don’t needle the seamstress
  • Pleat Child O’ Mine
  • Pleat dreams
  • Pleat it
  • Pleat Talkin’ Woman
  • Power serge
  • Presser foot fetish
  • Presser foot in the door
  • Presser footing around
  • Pretty in pinking shears
  • Put a pin in it

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With Q

  • Queen of sewing

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With R

  • Race to the bobbin
  • Rage against the sewing machine
  • Reap what you sew
  • Recommended daily seam allowance
  • Return of the Armscye
  • Rip it, rip it real good
  • Rise and sew
  • Rube Goldberg sewing machine

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With S

  • Seam on
  • Seam-stressed
  • Seams a little off
  • Seams legit
  • Seams too good to be true
  • Seamstress rising
  • See you sewn
  • Self-sewn
  • Selfish seamstress
  • Serge it through the grapevine
  • Serge mentality
  • Sergin’ general
  • Sew all the things
  • Sew amazing
  • Sew awesome
  • Sew caffeinated
  • Sew chatty
  • Sew chic
  • Sew cool
  • Sew creative
  • Sew cute
  • Sew easy
  • Sew excited
  • Sew extra
  • Sew fabulous
  • Sew fancy
  • Sew far, sew good
  • Sew fly
  • Sew fresh
  • Sew gifted
  • Sew glad
  • Sew glad we’re friends
  • Sew good
  • Sew impressed
  • Sew into you
  • Sew it goes
  • Sew it seams
  • Sew kitsch
  • Sew little time, sew much to do
  • Sew lovely
  • Sew luxe
  • Sew many projects, sew little time
  • Sew motion
  • Sew much fabric, sew little time
  • Sew much fun
  • Sew much love
  • Sew much to do, sew little time
  • Sew obsessed
  • Sew on and sew forth
  • Sew out on a limb
  • Sew perfect
  • Sew perfect together
  • Sew quirky
  • Sew ready
  • Sew special
  • Sew steady
  • Sew unique
  • Sew what?
  • Sew what’s the point?
  • Sew yeah
  • Sew-cessful
  • Sew-phisticated
  • Sew-spicious
  • Sewaholic
  • Sewcial anxiety
  • Sewcial butterfly
  • Sewcial change
  • Sewcial class
  • Sewcial distancing
  • Sewcial issues
  • Sewcial justice
  • Sewcial network
  • Sewcial responsibility
  • Sewcial security
  • Sewcial status
  • Sewcial studies
  • Sewcialist
  • Sewciopath
  • Sewing each day keeps the crazy away
  • Sewing forever, housework whenever
  • Sewing is cheaper than therapy
  • Sewing is harder than it seams
  • Sewing is my love language
  • Sewing is my superpower
  • Sewing is not as easy as it seams
  • Sewing isn’t a hobby. It’s a survival skill.
  • Sewing keeps me sane
  • Sewing mends the soul
  • Sewing pedal to the metal
  • Sewing. Because murder is wrong.
  • Sewists do it on the bias (see also “Bias Cut: All You Need To Know“)
  • Sewl provider
  • Sewn ranger
  • Sewrority
  • She believed she could, sew she did
  • Shear madness
  • Silk and honey
  • Silk Road
  • Six pleat under
  • Sleight of hand stitch
  • Slip stitch and slide
  • Sometimes you have to get ripped
  • Son of a stitch
  • Sorry seams to be the hardest word
  • Spool Doggy Dog
  • Spool down
  • Spool’s paradise
  • Star Wars: A New Hem
  • Stash advance
  • Stash diet
  • Stash money
  • Stash of the Titans
  • Stash only
  • State of the dart
  • Stitch and shout
  • Stitch bitch
  • Stitch happens
  • Stitch, please
  • Stitchy woman
  • Sweet seams
350+ Sewing Puns That Are Just Sew Funny! (1)

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With T

  • Talk to the hand stitch
  • Teach your children a love for fabric, and they’ll never have money for drugs
  • Thanks sew much
  • The Big Twill
  • The dart of seduction
  • The Empire Strikes Backstitch
  • The long way is the short way
  • The needle has landed
  • The seamstress life
  • The sew must go on
  • The Thread Zone
  • The Walking Thread
  • The Wool Monty
  • They see me spoolin’, they hatin’
  • Things that sew bump in the night
  • This sewing machine kills fascists
  • Thread of the class
  • Thread on arrival
  • Thread Poets Society
  • Thread ringer
  • Thread Zeppelin
  • Thread-end job
  • Thread, Bath & Beyond
  • Thready for anything
  • Thready, steady, sew!
  • Tic-tac-sew
  • Tickled pinking shears
  • Til’ we pleat again
  • To boldly sew where no man has sewn before
  • Top feed dog
  • Trying to selvage what’s left of my dignity
  • Twill life
  • Twill the cows come home
  • Tyranno-sew-rus rex

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With U

  • Unseamly
  • Us and hem

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With W

  • Wait one bobbin-picking minute
  • Wardrobe famous
  • Wardrobe perfect
  • Wardrobe supervisor
  • We gather together
  • We got the pleat
  • What seams may come
  • What’s sewing on?
  • When in doubt, stitch it out
  • Wind at my backstitch
  • Wool force
  • Wool Metal Jacket
  • Wool my finger
  • Wool tilt

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With X

  • X-rayon vision

Best Sewing Related Puns That Begin With Y

  • Yardage collector
  • Yes, I sew. No, I won’t hem your pants.
  • Yes, you do need more fabric
  • You are sew loved
  • You sew fine

Final Words

We hope you’ve enjoyed our particularly extensive list of the best sewing puns out there, and we’d love to know which one of the puns or one liners was your favorite, so don’t be afraid to get in touch. 

We have to say that “Thready for anything” is definitely one of our favorites, although “Gamma Rayon” is also extremely funny, but the truth is that all of these puns and one liners are funny, which is exactly why we included them on this list! 

Be sure to take your time and check out each section of the list to discover some of the funniest sewing related puns and one liners out there, and the list makes the perfect break for someone with a full day of sewing ahead (see also “What Is The Term For Someone Who Sews?“). 

With over 350 different one liners, puns, and jokes for you to use, it’s fair to say that your library of sewing related puns is going to be seemingly endless, which means that you’ll have plenty of them to use on the people around you, so maybe just make sure you’re not using them so much that you end up annoying people. 

So, discover your new favorite sewing pun today, and thanks for reading! 

Liz Miller
Latest posts by Liz Miller (see all)